Friday, April 29, 2011

Guys are mates, girls are love.

I identify as queer in order to rule out frustration. I used to be bisexual and actually dated a man for awhile last year. This brought on the idea that I may be pansexual as I was never sexually attracted to men but found some attraction in their personalities and physical features and somewhat what a man can offer a woman emotionally.

I think I was more comforted by the idea of men on a personal level and really finding out whether they are more than their re-productive organs.

I would still call myself pansexual but the relationship with this man did not end great due to me liking girls more than him.

So really, apart from confusion I would call myself a lesbian to prevent further hurt to a male, or plural.

From this understanding I try not to care too much for labels but I am aware that they can bring a lot of people clarity, pan sexuality especially.

I am intrigued by gender queer and transgender, or maybe I just find moustaches on women attractive. I am attracted to androgyny; particularly in women. The scotch drink or the suit and tie fashion – I dig it. I know I wouldn’t like to be a man; I am content in my womanhood. I suppose it’s rather the idea of playing a male role in a girl/girl relationship; cooking them dinner, taking care of them, comforting them, dominating in the bedroom, buying them flowers. I wouldn’t restrict all of these doings to the male role but I am just going on the traditional concepts and maybe that’s sparked from my interest in the 50’s conventional idea of the husband taking care of the wife. I don’t believe in the wife being constricted to the kitchen, that’s not what I’m saying. I’m simply saying I like the idea of the man taking care of the woman and seeing this played out in a lesbian relationship. Of course they are two different things. I guess I just like suiting up, slicking my hair back and being attracted to feminine women as well as the stereotypical dyke.

I would say the idea of gender transitioning is an interesting story in itself for me. Just like I find world war two and animals intriguing but obviously this is on another level to those things.
I would date a person who is transitioning and I accept it openly. I understand it can be confusing for people to recognise but that is why I learn about it as much as I can and try to make people comprehend it better and am all for supporting it in whatever way I can.

In short conclusion, I support and encourage anyone who may come across my words to pursue your instincts and heart. If it be someone struggling with their identity/sexuality or even curious. Don’t be afraid to be the you that YOU are; free and alive. Don’t be afraid and do what makes you happy. You only live once and there’s no point sitting back in fear watching your life roll on by without you. Be free and be proud! Seek these things out and learn for yourself about them, understand and educate yourself. There’s no harm in being curious and there’s nothing wrong with being unsure and confused. I believe our sexuality, our identities are a journey. One step at a time; this is an adventure and you’re in for the ride of your life.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

I work on my novel everyday...

...and my mother tells me i have to put my stuff "out there".

well have you ever thought that i don't have anything to put out there?

i doubt it.

This is my "professional" blog i know but i thought i would comment on my mum's comments about zines.

She believes most of them are rot and quote, 'twitter on paper', which is absolute bollocks in my opinion.
we have to fight for our right to be creative for free!!

Apparently she doesnt believe anything is really worth working on unless you are getting widely recognised for it and/or recieving money for it.

this = bullshit.

i'd love to say it but it really is...

do zines for the sake of art,

for the sake of freedom of speech

for the sake of getting to know other people

for the sake of getting noticed even just a little bit

of having fun

of being creative

of letting loose!!!!

Zeenster are defenders of their art everyday and we should continue to defend and fight for the freedom of enjoying what we do, what we love doing, what shapes us and expresses us.

The end.

Tumbleweed Zine Issue 2

SO, one of my drawings is in the new Tumbleweed zine :P its the first drawing in this post. Clearly i didnt think it through and should have done a better job but hey, you can always try better next time. these drawings just above are from a couple of artists also featured in the issue.

You can check out their blogger, tumblr or like them on facebook :)

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Think of Sparklers Think of clouds Think of fingers Clasped between another’s Think of how Think of when Think of heaven Think of bed This is that moment This is that how This is that heaven This is where you fell Between the cracks Through the clouds Past my fingers In the pits Life

Boo #2

Writing it up now and it should be in Sticky sometime this week!!

Friday, April 8, 2011

New (Free) Zine - BOO #1

So i've decided to make a bi-weekly zine!

It's called 'Boo'.

Each week i will write a short poem, make ten copies, put them in envelopes and stock them in sticky!

What drived me to do this is my lack of income to fund my photocopying for my main zines. But it's helped me to start writing poetry again though so i guess that's great!

what has been happening...?

I've been contemplating and pondering a lot about what i would like to do with my life and i've noticed people don't stop at one career so that inspired me because i was always like - photographer! no. Artist! no. Comic book artist! no. but now i could be...

zeenster/poet/writer/artist/freelance photographer/tshirt designer/etc etc etc :)

space is the limit